lyrics project

Hardest Part
Artist: Coldplay
Song: The Hardest Part
Album: X&Y
Model: Layla-Leigh
Location: Chippenham, Wiltshire

Notes:-
This song is all about the piano. I love keyboards being a major part of any song. Coldplay do it in spades. This song was on my playlist at the time I was in the worst relationship of my life. Worst because it was by far the hardest. We’d moved in together, had a gorgeous house, great jobs and thought we loved each other. The problem, I realised years afterwards, was that we were both stubborn and she was disliked by almost everybody I knew. I didn’t know that, although of course, I did really, I just didn’t want to see it. She was slightly unhinged.

During our turbulent and deeply unhappy relationship, I was totally confused. I just couldn’t figure out why I kept making her so angry and why, despite my begging, she refused to talk to me. I couldn’t understand why if she loved me, she could treat me so appallingly. I used to stand at the back door after work, take a massive deep breath, and push the door open with a big smile on my face, desperately hoping that I hadn’t done anything to upset her today. Occasionally, my smile was reciprocated, mostly it was met with venom. I was so completely unhappy and often pleaded with her to tell me how I could make things better. I was sorry, upset, angry, totally confused, hurt and aching. I did and said things that normally I wouldn't dream of doing or saying. I was a total mess. I would desperately try to be bright and breezy, especially when the kids were around. I slowly became less and less confident, I doubted myself, my character and my life. I remember leaving her eventually aged 40 with 10 plastic bin liners and a car. That was all I had to show for 22 years of working, my life was in the back of my car.

The song helped me in the aftermath. It helped me knowing I wasn’t the only one who had gone through what I had. The lyrics “And I tried to sing but I couldn’t think of anything”- “Everything I know, is, wrong – everything I do, just comes undone – and everything is torn apart” pretty much summed it all up for me. I was lower than I realised I was. The healing process took years.

The image surprisingly took years to come up with. I just couldn’t face doing the lines that meant the most to me so I chose this one. However, the bell (in the song) always meant ‘hope’ to me. I therefore thought of it as the start of something. Layla eventually came up with it signifying a door bell and I realised she was right and it was perfect. It shows hope, hope that someone you’ve been waiting for is going to knock on that door but it’s also confused with despair. The thought that maybe the doorbell doesn’t sound. That confusion and the possibility of reading it in two different ways is why the image works for me.

Hardest Part
Artist: Coldplay
Song: The Hardest Part
Album: X&Y
Model: Layla-Leigh
Location: Chippenham, Wiltshire

Notes:-
This song is all about the piano. I love keyboards being a major part of any song. Coldplay do it in spades. This song was on my playlist at the time I was in the worst relationship of my life. Worst because it was by far the hardest. We’d moved in together, had a gorgeous house, great jobs and thought we loved each other. The problem, I realised years afterwards, was that we were both stubborn and she was disliked by almost everybody I knew. I didn’t know that, although of course, I did really, I just didn’t want to see it. She was slightly unhinged.

During our turbulent and deeply unhappy relationship, I was totally confused. I just couldn’t figure out why I kept making her so angry and why, despite my begging, she refused to talk to me. I couldn’t understand why if she loved me, she could treat me so appallingly. I used to stand at the back door after work, take a massive deep breath, and push the door open with a big smile on my face, desperately hoping that I hadn’t done anything to upset her today. Occasionally, my smile was reciprocated, mostly it was met with venom. I was so completely unhappy and often pleaded with her to tell me how I could make things better. I was sorry, upset, angry, totally confused, hurt and aching. I did and said things that normally I wouldn't dream of doing or saying. I was a total mess. I would desperately try to be bright and breezy, especially when the kids were around. I slowly became less and less confident, I doubted myself, my character and my life. I remember leaving her eventually aged 40 with 10 plastic bin liners and a car. That was all I had to show for 22 years of working, my life was in the back of my car.

The song helped me in the aftermath. It helped me knowing I wasn’t the only one who had gone through what I had. The lyrics “And I tried to sing but I couldn’t think of anything”- “Everything I know, is, wrong – everything I do, just comes undone – and everything is torn apart” pretty much summed it all up for me. I was lower than I realised I was. The healing process took years.

The image surprisingly took years to come up with. I just couldn’t face doing the lines that meant the most to me so I chose this one. However, the bell (in the song) always meant ‘hope’ to me. I therefore thought of it as the start of something. Layla eventually came up with it signifying a door bell and I realised she was right and it was perfect. It shows hope, hope that someone you’ve been waiting for is going to knock on that door but it’s also confused with despair. The thought that maybe the doorbell doesn’t sound. That confusion and the possibility of reading it in two different ways is why the image works for me.